something looks wrong

This is a show about being insecure about being insecure.

These women don’t look right. Their eyes are the same, their bodies different. I drew one pair of perfectly dead eyes. Once on their distinctive bodies, the eyes take on a unique message.

Finding strength, insecurity hides behind the protective stare. Dead eyes are the protector, the shield against low self-esteem. They look to the side to avoid. They look to the side to empower. They look to the side to the future.

You look at the figures from afar and they are peaceful, delicate. Upon coming closer you see the internal dialogue. Communal eyes are hollow and dead, their bodies’ vulnerability barely peeking through. The women’s anonymity, their gaze, is strong and unified. A dead stare, dead eyes, reveals nothing, but inscribed thoughts reveal everything.

What is going on behind their single stare? They share a blank gaze that hides their individuality, their insecurity. This is comforting, protecting the inner self; and disruptive, releasing the inner demon.

I sit at my loom with fiber in hand and compose a base for the imperfect bodies. Handmade fabric is an intimate starting point. I weave the women’s internal canvas. States are delineated with yarn, and then filled by paint. Spiking with sadness, I plot the women’s emotional roadmap. The handmade fabric uniquely fingerprints each woman.

It is painful to not draw unique eyes on each face. Drawing emotionless women should be safe. Revealing as little as possible, my hands shake as they sketch flimsy arms and stoic torsos. I hesitate before pasting on an emotionless stare.

You can’t see me because I’m not there.